6 Coaching Tips to Create Happiness

I can say from direct experience in my own life and from working with so many life coaching clients, that these are the biggest obstacles to our happiness:

1) Being Overworked
2) Stress/Anxiety
3) Perceived Pressures (abstract & mind created – not enough time, family expectations, societal pressure, etc.)

These experiences become obstacles to our happiness because they create:

1) Fear
2) Life Imbalances
2) Lack of Fulfillment
3) Health Issues – Physical/Fatigue/Insomnia
4) Dysfunctional Relationships

Here are 6 tips that I have found to be helpful in transmuting these obstacles and thus create real change in our lives:

1) Increased Self-Care/12:12 Rule

Ensure you are engaging at least a few times a week in some sort of practice that is just for you that helps you to release pressure, stress, and anxiety. For example: yoga, meditation, running, eating well, and sleeping more and better.  If you can’t figure out how to get to find the time for this enlist an accountability partner – a friend, coach, mentor or trainer.  Someone who does this well.

There is a rule called the 12:12 Rule.  12 Hours of Input = 12 Hours of Output.  If we have 24 hours in a day, allow yourself to be fed and nourished in 12 of them, thus your output is productive and impassioned.  For input, sleep is part of the 12 hours and the other 4 are for self-care/fun/passion. For output, you have 12 hours of energy expenditure to the human experience as service.  If you do your inner work than those 12 hours of output are servicing by doing something you really enjoy (to the effect that it almost seems like 12 more hours of input, catch my drift?) Learn what you are passionate about!

2) Prioritization

Speaking of passion. We have lost our sense of priorities and what is important to us.

What’s important to you these days?  I have clients write their eulogies. What do you want to be known for in your life? At the end of the day what is most important? Are you fulfilling your dreams? Are you wasting time in fear and all the perceived pressures of life and expectations? Are you living your life?

Each week set aside priorities that move you toward fulfilling your goals and your soul’s purpose.

3) Organization & Understanding Time Suckers

With most my life coaching clients, I help them create structure. We create schedules of their week so that they can take back their time and empower themselves to be more in control of their lives vs their distractions like “time suckers”.  Time suckers are things we perceive to be important, but in actuality they may not be like Instagram & Facebook. I’m not saying these aren’t powerful marketing/promotional and social tools, but we all know that one post can lead to several hours of time lost. When we create schedules, we can allot how much time goes into our priorities first and then see where we are losing time or becoming inefficient.

4) Taking Back Control & Time

There are three work scenarios that I hear time and time again from people who overwork.

1) I stay late at work because I feel like I have to (regardless of whether there is work for me).  If I stay longer the perception is I work harder.
2) I have work to do, but I get distracted at work by conversations, food, and time suckers. I don’t get my work done. I must stay late.
3) There is just too much work and not enough man power.

We need to learn to empower ourselves to be productive, work efficiently, speak up and create healthy boundaries so that we are doing the work we get paid for.  This is healthy for you and best for your employer.   The fact is, we need to be more in control of our time and perceived perceptions of pressure and stress.  All of these scenarios are changeable if you are willing to accept responsibility.  And when we take back our power, many things in our lives shift.

5) Understanding Your Value & Self Worth

Many clients that I work with have an inherent self-worth issue. This is an epidemic in our society.  We are caught in the program loop of “lack” and “not enough”.  We have been spoon fed this idea that we don’t have the power to create what we desire in our lives.

Human beings were gifted with the Spark of the Divine (the Creator) thus we have the ability to Create! We need to understand that it is our birth right to summon this energy and use this to create what our Soul desires and to express our passions, gifts and talents.

6) Understanding your Gifts, Passions and Soul’s Desire

Based on the previous, if we can let go of these ideas of lack and not enough, we can jump the hurdle of fears and limited perceptions that keep us small.  We need to do the inner work to understand what are heart and soul is desiring based on what our passions, gifts and talents are.  Without this knowledge we get caught up in the mind’s perceptions that may not reflect the True Self.

Honoring the True Self is the Key to Being Happy!

I hope you find these tips helpful. As a mentor coach, there are so many tools in our tool box that can catalyze real change. We act as your accountability partner to keep you on track and empower you to shift your perceptions and overcome your shadows and blind spots. Ultimately, its about creating the understanding that the power to create anything is within you and you hold the key to your happiness.


Don’t let money prevent your happiness

I want to know your thoughts on this…my download that I wrote this morning.

For the majority of my life I used the excuse and societal programming “I don’t have enough money” to prevent me from doing things I wanted to do.  I’ve never made a ton of money. My largest income to date is $55K. I’m 42 years old. AND…I can pay all my bills, travel the world, be debt free, live on Venice beach, give to charity, have a new car, continually educate myself, get healings/massages, gift to my friends, play and eat well. I’m content and creative!

My message:  Don’t let money prevent your happiness and be the obstacle to getting what your soul really desires. Money is a mask for fear of taking risks and an excuse for not prioritizing yourself.

The lack mentality is so prevalent today. When your soul has passion for something, go for it and don’t let anything stop you!  The thing is, our society tricks us into believing that we need certain materials things. We have shifted our priorities away from our own healing, nurturance and ability to share.  We have become hoarders and slaves to material pressures. When you start to prioritize your heart, you can actually receive the gifts of true wealth, love and kindness.   Your heart recognizes the ability to share and when you can share, what follows is abundance of the heart, contentment and support.

In my experience, when I decided to stop running the scarcity program so many doors opened for me and what I needed appeared. I am still working on my relationship to money. I have had real fears and programming around it, instilled in me since birth.

I stopped hating money and using it as an excuse to shine my light.  I decided to treat it as an energy exchange only. I began to let it flow out naturally and to appreciate where it was going, to whom it was helping and would be grateful for it leaving my hands. I also began to let it flow in naturally because I could see that I truly deserved it coming to me for what I offer to the world as well. I tried not to get too entangled with it as being a symbol of materialism and viewed it as a symbol of exchange. Burning Man taught me about the gifting economy and I’ve begun to apply it more truly to all aspects of my life.

I’m learning that it represents an exchange that I co-create with just as much as I can co-create with the exchange of time. I can offer my services to people that help them feel well and they have talents that they can share with me. That in turn helps support me to give more and the cycle of love unites us. Time and money disappear, we become an exchange of love. When you give from your heart’s intention its energy is of the powerful Creator. Love begets more love.

What I have learned is that when you invest in yourself and your happiness abundance comes in many forms. If you believe you DESERVE happiness and you clear your vessel, the pathways will appear.  The universe co-creates and conspires with you if you BELIEVE in abundance.

Here are some things I have discovered around creating abundance:

1) Heal your wounds, limitations and relationship to the Self so you can believe you deserve abundance, love and money. You need to start with YOU.  Then you can help others.

2) What do you want to share with the world?

3) Do you have the skills/ability to offer this to the world?

4) Invest your time and energy into creating a toolbox that you can fill with all sorts of magical things to offer the world.

5) Don’t let anything stop you.  When there is a will there is a way.

6) Think creatively.  There are always creative ways to receive so you can give. Trade your time, assist a mentor, volunteer, share costs with a group.

6) Your happiness and abundance is not about money –  it is about your deepest desires!

7) Be clear about what your soul is here to do. The rest will come in time.

8) Your abundance and happiness depends on sharing it with those around you.

How do you create more abundance in your life?

I would love to hear your thoughts.