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When will you commit to yourself? 4 Simple Starters!

When will you commit to yourself?

How many times have you asked yourself this before?

You know how much better you feel when you commit to your practices, yet that’s the hardest thing to commit to.

What excuses do you observe ‘get in the way’ of your healthy habits like meditation, yoga, exercise, eating well, etc?

How is it that you know what is good for you, yet you do the bare minimum to get by?

What’s the best excuse you come up with?

As a Shamanic Empowerment Coach, my job is to empower people to commit to themselves and their well being.

Most people come to an empowerment coach not because they aren’t able to commit to external things (job, relationship, family), but rather because they have a tough time committing to the internal process of loving themselves.

I’ve heard every excuse in the book to prevent people from doing good things for themselves.

The most common I hear is “I’m too busy with _______(work, family, travel, kids, etc)”.

This excuse promotes that life is completely out of your control and that you have no say in your life.

Sometimes this means, “I don’t have the skills to prioritize my life.”

Other times this means, “I’m alone and I can’t ask for help.”

Or it could mean, “I need to feel important because I don’t feel good about myself.”

Or, better yet, “I don’t prioritize me.”

In the end, almost any excuse for not practicing your self-care really means, “I don’t truly love and care for myself.”

What’s your belief system around others that care for themselves?

I hear you saying things like that person is ‘selfish’, ‘lazy’ or ‘clearly not busy enough’ when you see them leave work at 5p and go to the gym.

I feel you getting jealous of others who dance in the fields, play in the woods, and sip coffee on the porch overlooking the mountain view.

I see you get mad at your partner when he goes out for a run and you are taking care of dinner.

You are judging and are in fact are upset that you didn’t set time aside for you.

What will it take for you to put yourself first? When will you finally commit to yourself?

What you don’t realize is that when you take care of yourself first, you will have more energy and love to go around.

When you fill your cup with prayer, meditation, affirmations, gratitude and self-care practices, you will have more patience and generosity available for others.

When you get clear on your priorities that fulfill your life, then your happiness is contagious and magnifies in others.

As your realize your dreams and actualize your visions, everyone around you benefits.

You don’t have to do it alone. Enroll, enlist, share and integrate your self-love and self-care practices into your life to include others and make it fun!

What’s stopping you from committing to yourself?

The next time you opt out from you, ask yourself what’s in the way.

Can you commit to yourself NOW?

Here’s 4 simple starters!

1. Notice your emotions and thoughts when you are NOT practicing self-care.

When you are not choosing  YOU notice your emotions. What old stories, wounds, and habits are stopping you from loving yourself? What “can’t” you do and why?

2. In the moment, CHOOSE LOVING YOU!

What will bring you (and ultimately others) more love right now?

3. Prioritize.

What’s really important?  What will make you more happy in the present and can the other things wait?

4. Schedule your self-care.

You book appointments for everything else, why not for yourself? Make non-changeable, non-negotiable commitments/appointments for YOU to meditate, exercise and fill your cup.

Bonus Tip:  Have fun!!  Your life is yours to have and do what you will with it! 

#nicoledohertyyoga #nicoledohertyhealingarts #shamanicpriestess #unleashthepriestesswithin #commitment #health #wellness #yoga #yogaeverydamnday

 

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4 Simple Steps to Overcome Perfectionsim

Have you ever struggled with perfectionism?

How often do you feel you have to be “right” and does this actually make you feel “wrong”?

Perfectionism is the ego’s procrastination tactic and stems from fear of rejection.

It’s an old ego story that developed from a feeling of being wronged, punished, rejected or invalidated in some way.

This story inhibits the creative process which is about making changes, finding contrast, being mutable and navigating the unknown.

You learn from your experiences.

I know that when perfectionism rears its head for me, tasks that could be simple turn into laborious ones.

How much do you think you have to know before you do something?

Does it prevent you from moving forward?

What kind of pressure do you put on yourself?

When you are stuck in this loop, you lose sight of the joy of the creative process.

I love this quote from Julia Cameron, from the Artist’s Way,

Perfectionism is the opposite of humility, which allows us to move slowly and steadily forward, making and learning from our mistakes. Perfectionism says do it “right”— or not at all.

Here are 4 simple steps to transmute this story:

1) Close your eyes. Smile. Place your hands on your heart. Say to the ego, “Thank you showing me my inner work!”

2) Direct your mind to your inner child and heart. Say, “I love you. I am enough!”

3) Breathe for a few minutes into your creative center, your pelvis, and say, “I open myself up to the joy of creativity that flows through me. I desire to share my gifts from Spirit authentically. Spirit…what can I offer in service to you?” Listen.

4) Open your eyes and take action from humility.

Move through your day in wonder about what’s flowing through you.

Spirit is working through you.

Let the creative process be fun and joyous.

xo,

Nicole

P.S. Share this blog and comment. I’d love to hear from you. What processes do you use to help you transcend procrastination?

Photo credit: Ben White on Unsplash

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3 Steps to Develop Trust in Yourself

Trust is big word.

Do you know what it means?

In the dictionary it’s defined as a ‘firm belief in the reliability, truth, ability, or strength of someone or something.’

So I looked up the word, “belief”.

In the dictionary its defined as to ‘accept (something) as true; feel sure of the truth of.’

So trust can be defined as, “a firm acceptance of the truth in the reliability, ability, or strength of someone (ourselves or another) or something.”

When clients come to me for healing and coachign, they admit they have a hard time trusting themselves and others.

If looking at the above definition you might ponder, what in their lives created a wavering in their reliability, ability or strength?

I say, the belief in the ego experience.

Your beliefs systems are a product of your childhood environment. You accept the opinions and attitudes of your parents, childhood friends and society. You ingest behaviors.

The ego is an artificial sense of who you are. It’s an idea based on other people’s opinions. You begin to believe this is who you are and and then think of yourself in this way.

You have a hard time accepting the truth about yourself as a reliable, strong, and powerful creator.  Yet, your true essence is Love – limitless, boundless, and free.

You believe so deeply in this Ego identity that you cannot often see your True Self.

The ego in and of itself is neither good or bad; it just is. It’s a stage in our development that serves its purpose…it needs to be progressively shed in favor of the re-emergence of our true self from the mists of childhood. ~Shefali Tsabary, PhD.

You are now witnessing the societal collective egoic programs that have been running for a long, long time that say, “you are not enough”.

You are awakening and remembering the non-dual truth of Love, yet you live in the nature of dualism, ego and lack consciousness.

You are undergoing a big shift – understanding the Divinity in all things and seeing yourself in the other.

You are beginning to understand that you have the ability to bring God intelligence into manifest.

You are witnessing that you impact “the other” greatly and that you have this innate power and intelligence inside of you.

How can you step forward into trust?

Or as defined above, change your beliefs to become ‘firm in the reliability, truth, ability or strength of yourself and the other?

This brings me to the Yoga Sutras and the concept of Kriya Yoga.

Kriya Yoga is what is said to release our suffering that is rooted in self-ignorance (ego which keeps us separate) and lead us to Self-realization/God.

Kriya Yoga is also referred to as the concept of “skill in action”.

Creating “skill in action” has three steps.

These are 3 Steps that will help you develop trust in the other and yourself:

1) Discipline/Self-Purification/Heat/Body ” – Tapas = Strength

2) Self Study/Reflection/Mind – Svadhyaya   = Reliability

3) Devotion/Surrender to God/Soul – Isvara Pranidhana = Truth

 

You can become trusting of yourself when you do your inner work.

You can show yourself how to build strength in your body, by purifying and practicing and disciplining yourself. Through a physical practices like yoga, you can start to overcome the stories and beliefs of your limited mind.

When you self-reflect, you discover reliability through making conscious choices and closing the gap on your subconscious programs through self-awareness. Yoga has been defined as bringing the subconscious to the conscious and creating union. This way you take ownership for yourself and control the monkey mind. You become aware of our reactivity, judgments, and ego and become discerning and responsible.

When you surrender to a spiritual belief system that all is Divine, Love and in Perfect Order then you release a lot of the pain and suffering that feeds the Ego of separation. When you surrender to the beauty of all as equal under the eyes of God, then you can see the truth that Love flows through you as YOU.

This is a mind-body-spirit approach to developing trust in yourself and the other.

I will share a testimonial from a client who went through my Unleash the Priestess Within + Thrive integrative healing and coaching program.

This is what it feels like to develop trust in yourself!

I had no idea what to expect from this program, but I believed in Nicole and her ability to help me find whatever it was I was looking for. I needed a guide, someone who was spiritual but also successful and pragmatic in her approach to healing. I recognized all of my own potential and saw glimpses of who I could become, but felt as though I was somehow preventing myself from acting on this potential. Envisioning the life I could have made me happy, but I was depressed about feeling disconnected from the path that would guide me there. I was stuck and I needed help. My intentions for the program were vague: I wanted to be happy with my work, I wanted to accept myself as I am, and I wanted to get rid of my attachments to past experiences. Through my work with Nicole, these intentions became clear and powerful. Exploring what happiness means to me, who I am, and what experiences I was holding onto gave me a greater sense of self-awareness and a greater appreciation for the experiences of others as well. I am more accepting of myself, which naturally has led to a greater feeling of connection with and acceptance of the world around me. Once this was realized, everything else had a tendency to fall into place. This program was challenging, but I am left feeling proud of myself for taking a risk and investing in something that has essentially granted me freedom. I would recommend Nicole’s program to anyone who is looking to take back her power and move beyond whatever self-imposed barriers are keeping her from following the path that was meant for her. ~ Misa, Coaching Client

 

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What about you is toxic?

“I am not smart enough.”

If you have been reading these blogs you probably have heard something similar, “I’m not good enough”.  This was my story, as part of another story.

Many of us walk around with what are called “toxic traits” coined by David Simon in his book, “Free to Love. Free to Heal.”
Our consumer society thrives off of these beliefs so that it can sell you more things to help you “improve” who you are.
You are too wrinkly…buy this cream!
You are too fat…freeze if off!
You are too frumpy…buy this purse!
The fact is if we learn to really love, accept and approve of ourselves exactly as we are, we don’t really need much. 

When we don’t need much we also start living in harmony with Earth. We recognize in Shamanism the concept of sacred reciprocity or ‘ayni’ which means living in harmony with the Earth and not creating a ton of waste. When you love yourself, you start to recognize the importance of loving all beings that we are connected with.

When you are in your story, you are in Ego and in resistance with life. When I was in this “I’m not smart enough” story,  I would let other people’s opinions supersede my own truths, considering I wasn’t smart enough to hold my own. It kept me inert for a long time and got me in trouble.
The blessing in this story as I look back was that I overachieved to compensate for “not being smart enough” and pursued information like an addiction which is now how I can share the wisdom I hold. 
And now, because I have healed this story, I pursue information not to gain approval from anyone, but to share wisdom in the service of other beings’ healing process.
Find out what toxic traits you still hold about yourself.  And see how these are playing out in your life. If you don’t know, sign up for your FREE Shamanic Priestess session and find out. Click Here 
The thing is… if you want to lose weight, you don’t run around telling yourself how bad you are, what you lack and how ugly you are and then expect results.
Accepting yourself and loving yourself for who you are is the key to positive change. 
When I work with my Shamanic Empowerment Coaching clients we get to a place of understanding, gentleness and care with the Self.  We set up self-care practices.  We learn to love ourselves like we would love a child. Then, we can start to see results.
Stop abusing and criticizing yourself and see what happens.

Infinite blessings on the path to awaken to the Divinity in all,

Nicole

Http://nicoledoherty.com

“Our power to manifest is equal to our power to generate our own evolution.”
– Claire Zammit
forgiveness

How can I forgive?

“How can I forgive this?”
That was something I have said to myself over and over again.
There are some things that have happened to me that seem irreparable, yet I have been able to forgive.
What I have learned over the years, is that you can’t change the past, but you can change your mind about it now in the present. 
How do you do that?
It’s become part of my life’s work and what I love to share with my clients.
Deepak Chopra helped me with this one a while ago when I was going through a breakup. He said, “Forgiveness is for me. Forgiveness sets you free.” 
The thing is, people make decisions based on their needs and their level of awareness at the time of an event.  That doesn’t always mean that its the best for you. Things can be unexpected.
Yet, if you hold on to these feelings of resentment from the past, you are just punishing yourself in the present.  The person that you are not forgiving isn’t walking around being punished by you because of your feelings, that’s happening to you.
Old stories formulate emotions. If they aren’t released and forgiven, then they can remain trapped in your mind-body system.  Each time the mind relives these stories, those same feelings can be elicited.  If we don’t release them, and forgive them, the negative beliefs can form “dis-ease” or disease in our bodies.
So why not give it up and let it go?
The best thing I’ve found about my forgiveness process is that when no stone is left unturned, you have so much freed up energy and no one to hide from. There is only beauty left in your life, friendships and love.
Rest assured the final say is with karma and God.
If you want to learn more about forgiveness and letting go — sign up for your FREE Shamanic Priestess session. You may just learn there are a few more things to forgive and forget. Click Here

Infinite blessings on the path to awaken to the Divinity in all,

Nicole

Http://nicoledoherty.com

“Our power to manifest is equal to our power to generate our own evolution.”
– Claire Zammit